#4- 20 weeks HALFWAY!

I'm halfway done brewing my fourth baby.

As the queen of getting pregnant, I'm having a hard time reminding myself that this could very well be the last time.  I'm so busy that it's hard to take the time and savor some of the things going on.  I am NOT savoring the pure exhaustion that fills my every waking moment.  I could do without that.  I am trying to pay close attention and put away in my mental memory box the delicate little kicks and rolls.  The swishes I can feel going on in there that will only get stronger and stronger until they almost hurt.  It really is the best part of pregnancy the feeling of the movement.

My belly is getting large.  I often "forget" that I'm pregnant and get really annoyed when my belly doesn't fit into tight places it used to or I bump into things that I feel like I just could do fine last week.  Squirt is really getting big in there.  I've even started outgrowing some of the maternity clothes that I have.  DANG.  I personally feel that as a mother and a growing mother at that, sorting through clothing is one of the worst jobs and the most unappreciated.  Sorting through three kids worth of clothes is ANNOYING.  Add my own clothes to the mix and I'm just done.  Everyone should just go naked.  Ok, not naked.  Most of the time my kids are in their underwear though.

There really isn't much to report for this week.  I'm not as funny and clever as last week because I'm a different sort of exhausted right now.  My funny posts come on the days where I'm both exhausted and irritated with the day.  Then I don't give two sh*ts about what I say.  Now I'm just too tired to even think.

I had my first chiropractor appt this week.  I'm all messed up but that doesn't surprise anyone.  Now I'm just all sore.  Again, not surprising.  We do have our ultrasound on Monday!  Very excited to see our little Squirt up on the big screen!  We plan on bringing the whole clan to the big event. That poor ultrasound tech...  This is when we will see how Max does on his skill with reading people.  He is 3 for 3 on guessing the sex of the baby based purely on how the Doctor acts/talks during the ultrasound.  The Doctor that did the other three no longer works at our clinic so this will be a new person.  I can't even tell you how PISSED I'll be if this person screws up and tells us the sex of the baby.  The wrath of my hormones will be upon them.

You know, I'm enjoying the nice tan that my arms and face have accumulated over the summer.  Too bad my belly screws up my "tan" facade and shows what my skin tone really is

#4- 19 weeks and counting

What the HECK.  Nineteen weeks?  NINETEEN WEEKS?  I swear, I just rolled over and told Max, "Whoops...well, that takes care of that.  I'll be pregnant. You watch."

This is flying by.  People, you better start your Christmas shopping because I will blink again and wake up pushing this human out of me.  Holy schnikes.  NINETEEN WEEKS.  Let me get over my shock.

I knew this pregnancy would go fast.  I mean, I have three small kids so there is no time in the day to dwell on anything let along the fact that another human is growing inside me.  I'm pregnant over an insanely busy summer so weeks are flying by just from our schedule.  Friday turns into Thursday immediately.

Anyway, onto baby talk.

I had a bit of a scare?  No, that's not the word... a concerning moment a couple weeks ago.  I've been having Braxtons as you know which is no big deal but I started having some intense, and I mean intense pressure with some cramping thrown in for good measure.  While I was sure this was probably somewhere along the lines of normal, this was not normal for me.  I never had anything like this while pregnant with the other three so I called up my doc's nurse to see what she thought.  In stellar VIP style, Susa (the doc) actually called me back.  I was shocked too.  I'm sure we will see it on our bill.  I had no bleeding and he didn't think it was labor so early on so there was no reason to come in unless that started.  I was told to "take it easy, Jessie.  You need to slow down." Hahahaha.  Yeah, that's happening.  HELLOOOOO, Susa, you have been all down in my business three times getting the fruit of my loins out of my body.  Slowing down is not possible.

In all seriousness, I do really need to tone things down and have been trying.  I find it very hard to have restrictions during pregnancy but my husband is awesome and just making me sit.  "Relax" is a work I hear often.  I try to do this for the baby.  I feel immensely guilty though when I see Max come home from working all day and then run around the house tending to the kids, making dinner, checking on me to be sure I'm listening.  Have I mentioned how awesome my husband is?  He rocks.

My little Squirtypie is very active now.  I feel him all the time rolling and kicking around in there.  Max has felt him once while we were snuggling to sleep.  I was facing his back and the baby gave a giant kick and Max felt it on his back.  Dexter has also felt the baby with his hand but it was so faint I think Dex didn't believe it was from the baby.  Squirt will get stronger and stronger and then he will believe it more.

This summer is dreadful.  Awful.  Disgusting.  Hence the fact that I didn't even want to put on shorts to do a bare belly photo.  I can't stand this heat when I'm pregnant.  Why, oh WHY can't fall come?  Not fall so much as the weather?  Forget summer and the stupid humidity this year.  Normally, sure, throw it at me.  Love it but this year?  Yuck.  I'm miserable.  I think of those poor, poor souls due in August or September and I think, "Suckers!  Didn't know when to get preggo".  This heat causes swelling, water retention and bad attitude out of me.  My poor kids are only allowed outside with me during the early morning or late evening.  This is a boring summer for them.

I read that I'm supposed to stay off my back now.  Good gravy.  I already had to give up my stomach sleeping months ago and now I have to stay off my back?  What are they trying to do to me?!!  And for some reason, I have developed this horrible trait where if there is any light in the room, ANY LIGHT, I can't sleep.  So, in a tricky turn of events, I am actually starting to sleep though the night (no pee wake up calls!) but waking up at 6 to pee means I'm up at 6 because those tiny amounts of light coming through the blackout curtains keep me awake.  Dumb. This lack of sleep is contributing nicely to my bad attitude from the humidity.  I must be a joy to be around.

Until next week!  When I am halfway done.  AH!

#4- 17 weeks

I'd like to start by saying:
A.  I don't like to base my photography skills on my weekly photos.  I promise I am better than what these show.  I'm generally in a hurry for these and my house is dark.  Get it done.  In and out.  You get the picture.
B.  I dug up the weekly photos from my pregnancy with Dexter so you can compare a wee bit.  I had to crop that weird though because I don't know what I was doing back then when I saved everything.

Another week skipped.  This has been and continues to be a crazy busy summer.  Last weekend I was up on the North Shore visiting my friend, Sarah.  Rachel came with me and it was a heavenly escape from the mom-ness of our lives.  For the first time, I had a rough time transitioning to vacation mode where no one needed me, there was nothing to do and nothing to clean.  I could just sit down.  Perhaps read a book.  It was amazing.

Anyway, so Squirt grew.  I'm feeling my little lovebutt more and more every day which is great.  It sounds like Max is excited for when we will be able to feel the babe from the outside.  I remember clearly this happening before the 20 week ultrasound with Ada but this baby doesn't feel as strong as she did so I don't know if that will be the case this time.  I can't wait though for the boys to feel the baby.  They will be so excited!

I was starting to get out of that first trimester exhaustion but this past week has just completely leveled me.  I am so, so exhausted I can barely do much more than stay off the couch.  Because this is impossible to do with three small kids I've been as crabby as a bear.  I hope my kids still like me by the end of this pregnancy.  It is just unbelievable how tired pregnancy makes you.  I feel like a schmuck when my hubby comes home and I haven't even been able to clean up the kitchen after lunch.  Thank goodness he is very understanding.  I know I need to tone things down and just take it a bit easy but that just doesn't seem possible.  There is too much to do anyway and the few things we are doing around here to prep for baby need to be done during the summer before daycare starts back up again.  Fall is coming and things are insane for the photo business so basically it will be go go go until November.  Then I will only be a month out!

I'm surprised to say that I've already been getting Braxton Hicks.  I was going to look up to see if that is normal or not because it just doesn't seem like I should be getting them this early.  I know I don't drink enough water which causes them but I never drink enough water and didn't with any of my pregnancies so this isn't any different.  Again, I probably just need to take it easy.  I'm overdoing it.

Here and there I feel a lot of pressure on my pelvis almost like things are settling or something.  I don't remember that happening so early with the other three.  It seems once you hit the 4th pregnancy, your body and uterus just give up and say, "TO HELL WITH YOU".  I have all the late 2nd trimester pregnancy symptoms already.  My back is a bit sore, my hips get achy and I swear I can almost feel my body walking in a waddle.  Honestly, the bod is giving up.  I had my first bout of swelling this week.  Super awesome.  My legs and feet were a bit puffy.  I'm sure that was from driving home from the North Shore as I noticed it right when we got home.

Sorry, no cheeky snarky words of life this week.  I'm too tired.  I'll be skipping next week again as we are heading up to the cabin for a long weekend with a hellaofalot of people in a small cabin.  Good times!

#4- 15 weeks

How are you supposed to start these things?

Dear Squirt,

This week we got the flu.  That was not fun.  Why the dickens in the flu going around in July?  That isn't right.  After we finally felt better, my stomach was so flat that it didn't even look like you were in there.  Seems as though you have made me regain my shape already.  

We went to the Afton Strawberry Festival last weekend and we stopped at this one vendor who sold  salsas and jams.  When I told him that I don't normally like strawberries but have been craving strawberry flavor with this pregnancy, he looked around at our little family of tiny kids and said, "I love me a good Catholic woman."  Hmmm... As if our frequency at reproducing is strictly religion based.  I know he meant it in good humor but he's lucky that I'm easy going.  I informed him that I am indeed not Catholic but merely extremely fertile.  Take that.

I know I felt you this week!  I can't pinpoint a day but here and there you have made yourself known.  Even just within the hour when I was bent over trying to get the best angle for blowing bubbles for your siblings you gave me a kick and made yourself known.  Granted your kick felt like little flutters but it was you.  It's nice to finally feel you!  Dex and Simon will be so, SO excited the first time they get to feel you.  It will be a while before that.

You gave me my first heartburn this week.  I'm not looking forward to the heartburn that you will give me later.  It was manageable this time and I could even forget about it for a while but it was there.  I only get heartburn while pregnant.  

Your father and I have no headway on your name.  Generally I'm very strict about making sure we have it picked out before the ultrasound since you father is so good and guessing what you are but this time?  Eh.  We have gone through and dissected names three times and I'm just not wanting to deal with it.  Daddy might get his way and will just come up with it when we do.  The only names we end up liking are on the top 100 and I try to stay away from that.

Love you Squirtypie.  Until next week!

#4 14 weeks

I should be embarrassed by my photo but you know what?  This is real life.  I haven't showered in a couple days, my hair hasn't been washed in God knows when (5 or 6 days is my guess), the last time I shaved my legs I forgot to shave one of them and for the love of all that is holy my children woke up at SIX A.M. THIS MORNING.  I am not in the best of moods at the moment.

I know that we have missed week 12 & 13 but I was on a lovely vacation far, far away from all responsibility aside from the survival of my current 3 children.  We road tripped out to Washington State to see family and made some stops at Glacier National Park in Montana and also stopped in Rapid City for a day to see Mt. Rushmore.  We had a grand time and Squirt was very nice to mom.  I didn't have to pee too often and my nausea did rear its ugly head a few times but nothing horrible.  All in all a very big success!

Squirtypie had his/her first doctor appointment on Monday.  Susa didn't seem surprised to see me.  All he asked was why my hair looked different.  The man has seen my who-ha 8 million times but he notices my hair.  Which, by the way, nothing was different.  It was wet because I had enough time to shower quick before my appointment.  I'm sure he would have loved doing a cervical in my current cleanly condition.

Squirt's heartbeat was running at 153 beats per minute and I got to see baby on the big screen!  At first I didn't think I needed an ultrasound but changed my mind at the last minute.  I couldn't resist seeing my little pumpkin.  Everyone agreed with my dates so due date remains 12/25 but Squirt was measuring almost a week bigger.  I know that means nothing.  Probably all the snacks I had on the trip fattened him up.  Every single time I see my babies in an ultrasound I'm amazed at what Max and I create.  There really is a baby in there.  That hit me very hard while at the appointment.  Obviously I knew I was pregnant but I'm busy.  I'm running around after 3 kids so I don't have much time to think about it.  I am growing a human baby part Max part me in there.  Another addition to our clan.  I can't believe it.

I got all the normal tests done, I'm doing another water birth so got that extra HepC test done and lucky me it was time for a pap smear as well.  Thank goodness I didn't have the kids with me.  My Gma and my aunt watched them for me.  I can just imagine the questions Dexter would come up with if he was in the room while I was having a cervical done.  "Why is the doctor looking between your legs? "  "Why don't you have underwear on?"  "Can I see that metal thing?  "Does Daddy know what's going on?"  Oh gosh.  Seriously.

I'm anxiously anticipating feeling the baby hopefully this week!  I felt Simon & Ada at 14 weeks so I hope the same follows for Squirt.  I guess I will let you know next week.

Off to shower and hopefully my foul mood goes down the drain with all the dirt and grime and momness that has accumulated.

#4- 11 weeks

This is dejavu times four.

How am I doing this already again?  FOUR KIDS.  I can't even.

Let's stick to the facts.  Fact is this baby is a slight surprise for us.  While we did plan on having a 4th baby, we did not plan on one right now.  This baby is magic.  That's a lie.  We know what happens to make babies.  And here this baby is.

My sweet little squirt is due on Christmas Day.  We haven't gone to the doctor yet because, again, let's be honest.  This is a 4th baby.  I have had 3 very healthy pregnancies before this and there is just no need to rush to the doctor.  I'm well aware I'm pregnant and don't need a pregnancy confirmation.  I'm well aware of the exact date of conception so I know our due date.  I have made the doctor appointment for when we are about 14 or 15 weeks.  I don't remember.

This exhaustion is kicking my A**.  Seriously, this is the hardest so far to deal with.  I have no morning sickness, mild nausea and an aversion to all food that is healthy for me (much to Max's dismay) but man alive I am tired ALL THE TIME.  I have to get a nap in every day and I am normally not a napper.  I can easily go to bed at 8:00 pm and waking up at 7:00 am is very difficult.  Sleep is all I want.  Sleep and homemade mac & cheese with velveeta.  And all processed foods.  I'm looking forward to *hopefully* this exhaustion leaving around 14 weeks like it did with the other three.

My stomach pooched out almost immediately.  How do I know this?  About the week we found out we were for sure pregnant (about 4 weeks) Dexter was watching me after dinner and said, "Oh wow Mom!  It looks like there is a baby in your tummy!"  He said that many times before we finally told the kids at 10 weeks.  I feel larger than the previous pregnancies but my uterus is all stretchy and pissed about being in constant use.

I'm still mildly breastfeeding Ada.  She is very attached to nursing and while I have no interest in tandem nursing both Ada and Squirtypie, I don't have the heart to wean her off yet.  I have her down to just before and after nap and before and after bed.  This is all happening on my left side as my right side is as dry as the desert in summer.  My poor working boob hurts like the dickens though.  Ada does a number on it trying to get more milk than what is available.

Do you know what happened yesterday?  This should be embarrassing but I'm pregnant so I'm not embarrassed about anything.  Max was staring at me and pointed out an irregular hair on my chinny chin chin.  I say irregular hair because I refuse to use THAT WORD.  You know... whisker.  It was not THAT WORD.  While I will admit it was not a normal peach fuzz it didn't have the girth or strength of THAT WORD.  I tried to get it but couldn't without a mirror so I *gasp* let Max get it.  That there will get you pregnant.  Watch out.  Nothing attracts a man more than pulling out irregular hairs.

Until next time.  Meaning next week.  Not my next pregnancy which I'm sure will happen two minutes after I have Squirt because Max and I are the KING AND QUEEN OF ALL FERTILITY!

DIY carpet cleaner for poopy situations... literally.

I'm writing this blog for any other mommas out there who might find themselves in the same situation I found myself in at 615 a.m. this morning.

You are never on top of your game at 615 in the morning.  I don't care who you are.  I don't care if you are a morning person or if you had 18 hours of sleep previous to waking up at 615 in the morning.  You aren't fooling anyone.

If you are anything like me, you went to bed *early* for the first time all week and for some magical reason, the universe decided to let you sleep for 6 or 7 hours straight.  But then, the universe strikes back.  You find yourself being woke up from a 1/2 sleep nursing daze by your 22 month old holding his hand out. 

In this 1/2 sleep nursing daze you are in, you don't notice anything in his hand.  You pat his head and tell him to get off the bed.  You lazily roll yourself out of bed bringing the baby with you.  You tell your generous husband who is offering to get up with the kids to go back to sleep since you have been half awake since 530 when your 3 year old came into your room trying to sneak into your bed.

Oh how you will regret turning down his offer.

You will then notice your 3 year old sitting on the stairs.  The carpeted stairs.  You will then notice your 22 month old pointing at something on the stairs.

Then it happens.  You smell something.  Crap.  I mean this literally and figuratively. 

THERE IS POOP ON YOUR STAIRS.  And not just one stair.  And not just a turd.  I'm talking squishy, nasty mushy poop on multiple stairs.

Honestly.  You control your instant reaction (which is, of course, yelling WHAT THE HELL!!!!!) and then carry your poop smearing child to the bathroom so the squishy, smelly glob of doom doesn't spread even more past the top of the pajama bottoms.  You toss said child into the shower while continuing to yell "WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!" in your head but verbally just telling your child you disapprove of this wake up call.

Then you realize... how the devil do you get this poop off the stairs?  You don't have a carpet cleaner (something you are finding that with 3 young kids you should really invest in) and you have no idea how to get this s**t off the carpet.

Here it is.  Tried and true. 

DIY Carpet Cleaner
1/2 qt hot water
1 TB white vinegar
1 TB dish soap
generous dash of peroxide
5-6 drops of Tea Tree Oil

Get as much of the squishy, smelly glob of doom of your carpet as you can with toilet paper or paper towel or if you are a crunchy, natural sort use a prefold.  Whip up this simple little recipe and use whatever you have to scrub to get the rest out.  I used an old toothbrush.

That s**t is off the stairs and now that you have had some coffee, you are feeling a little better.